February 2012
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whynotshesaid:
Dear coworker,
I get that you are really interested in getting in shape. I totally understand.
But no one wants to hear that you are burning seven calories by walking to pick up a 200-calorie biscotti.
No one wants to hear that you were at your lowest weight when you went on an all-protein shake diet before your birthday.
No one wants to hear about how you skipped birthday...
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When I was small, I spent days at my grandmother’s house. I used to make breakfast for her, a three year-old’s breakfast with a sliced banana and chocolate syrup. We watched a lot of television. She pored over the Bible and so did I, unquestioning, parroting. She knew everything in the whole world and I loved her with all my heart.
During my adolescence I learned “no” and...
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every meal I’ve prepared in the past two days has included cream cheese, excluding breakfast, which was three eggs and four pieces of bacon.
you aren’t being very sneaky, period. why don’t we just get it over with.
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SKYRIM CREATION KIT IS OUT
face-down-asgard-up:
YESSSSS
And Valve put out a special little something
The stupid little personality core from Portal 2 ( SPAAAAAAAAAACE! ) can now crash land into Whiterun hold.
IT IS HILARIOUS
SHIT GOD YES i am excited about this
ryanvoid answered your question: Hello, I’m off today
Do a music thing with Esther and me tonight. There may be cake.
Cake? Music? Where do I sign up?
Hello, I'm off today
What the hell are all my friends doing?
Sephora
tomyhusband:
Here, take this flare gun. If I’m not back with some lip gloss in twenty minutes, fire it once into the air and cancel all of our credit cards.
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elli-mae:
Occupy, homelessness just short of felony
occupynashville:
A committee of the state House of Representative sent a bill to remove Occupy Nashville protesters from the state Capitol to the House floor after increasing the bill’s penalty to nearly a year in jail or a $2,500 fine.
The House Judiciary Committee voted 14-2 to approve a ban on unauthorized camping on public...
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The neighbors just got a new dog.
They let it outside every morning, whereupon it barks for what seems like eternity. This must be what it feels like when mothers hear someone else’s baby crying. I WOULD LET YOU INSIDE IF YOU BELONGED TO ME, PUPPY. I WOULD SNUGGLE YOU. I WOULD NOT YELL AT YOU TO SHUT UP.
Bad pet owners boil my guts.
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Why do businesses have separate male/female...
the-womanifesto:
I just do not understand this. At my work and plenty of other places, there are two single-toilet bathrooms. You go inside and lock the door. Except they’re separated by male and female. There is nothing special or different about them. They’re identical bathrooms. Why is this necessary?
I’ll even see a line of women (because we always have the lines) waiting outside the...
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“Look at what’s happened just in our tolerance for abortion. Fifty years ago…60...”
– Rick Santorum, reminiscing about the days when thousands of women died each year in the US from unsafe abortions
Because if we aren’t popping out a baby at least every other year, we might as well die. Right, ladies?
(via greaterthanlapsed)
Yes sixty years ago that may have been the case but 200...
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feministsbakecupcakestoo replied to your post: There is no restaurant in this town that will…
I would deliver a cheeseburger to your house just to see your pretty face. =]
You are too wonderful. <3
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ashleyhuge replied to your post: There is no restaurant in this town that will…
Did you hear about how Burger King may start delivering nationwide? I know this isn’t relevant to your needs tonight, but still.
Dream. Come. True.
There is no restaurant in this town that will deliver a cheeseburger to my house. This is a grave disappointment.
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Instead of doing anything useful, I played skyrim and took a nap. Since I woke up, I have been vaguely upset about everything with a side of heartburn.
I have a really hot cousin.
She’s lived in California her whole life and I’ve only ever seen her when her family has come to visit. She’s also a former gogo dancer who goes to festivals all the time and posts pictures on Facebook of herself wearing very little.
I had to restrain myself from clicking “like” on her most recent set of almost-naked pictures. Awkward.
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I conquered work.
5AM - 1:30PM shifts are how I know there’s no god.
Now: Skyrim, paint, Discworld, nap.
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aflamingbouquet replied to your photo: I listed my political views as “socialist,” so now…
You’re better than that website, dear.
I know, I know. I have chatted with a few people that weren’t complete idiots, though. Those just aren’t funny enough to post here.
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Things you should not apologize for:
skirtonfire:
- your body
- your tears (for making someone uncomfortable because they can’t handle a little emotion)
- not knowing something
- your anger (because your anger, as a girl is never legitimate. always cute or feisty or annoying)
- your opinions (or having the audacity to tell the truth about something you know)
- how slow you run
- asking too many questions
- being excited...
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dazaibrosamu:
JAX WHY DO SHITHEADS KEEP MESSAGING YOU THAT AIN’T RIGHT
I’m an easy target, I guess? There’s some pretty inflammatory and insulting shit on my profile, which I put there on purpose to try and weed out people I obviously wouldn’t get along with. So far it’s making for a really entertaining inbox.
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I couldn't ship Simon/Kaylee any less.
ryanvoid:
Eurgh. So contrived and boring. HURRR AREN’T SMART DUDES INEPT AT MAKING TIME WITH THE LADIES AMIRITE KAYLEE’S JUST SO EARTHY AND SIMON’S JUST SO SMART BUT YA PUT ‘EM TOGETHERAND oh, wait. GODDAMN NOTHING, THAT’S WHAT
I am with you so hard on this.
I concur with the person who said they ship Kaylee/Jayne. Match made in greasy, horny, simple heaven.
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